BMN : Chapter 32

After visiting the prison, Fu Ming returned to the Jin residence and received another letter from Zhou Qinqing, urging him to leave as soon as possible. Zhou emphasized that the sooner Fu Ming left, the sooner Jin Yi could return to the mansion.

Fu Ming instructed Lu Fei and Wanlan to pack his belongings. He realized that he had fewer possessions now than when he first entered the Jin family.

Lu Fei and Wanlan, shocked by the news of his departure, initially thought it was a short trip. However, when Fu Ming instructed them to pack the keepsakes of his late parents from the locked cabinet, they were utterly stunned and asked him why. Fu Ming couldn’t fully explain the situation, so he abandoned subtle explanations and simply said, “It’s time to give back what I’ve taken. If you want to come with me, pack your things. If you wish to stay at the Jin residence, you’re welcome to do so. The masters here are all kind and surely won’t mistreat you because of me… But the future is uncertain.”

Despite Lu Fei’s gentle persuasion and Wanlan’s tearful pleas, Fu Ming remained resolute. After calmly responding a few times, he became cold and detached, saying, “Enough, if you can’t bear to leave, then stay. I’ll go alone.”

Feeling utterly hopeless, Lu Fei and Wanlan exchanged glances, recognizing that Fu Ming was determined and there was no turning back.

Fu Ming, while appearing resolute, felt a deep sadness. He wanted to say proper goodbyes to everyone, but the words were stuck in his throat.

He couldn’t directly tell them he was leaving, thinking that when Jin Yi returned, they would understand. They might be shocked and saddened initially, but would eventually move on. To them, he was a fleeting presence in the household, and in the future, they might completely forget him or remember him with a hint of curiosity or even disdain…

Fu Ming forced himself to stop overthinking. The more he thought about it, the more painful it became.

Suppressing his emotions, he acted as usual, though he hugged Zhaoyan close while teaching him the final passages of *The Thousand-Character Classic*: “孤陋寡闻，愚蒙等诮。谓语助者，焉哉乎也.”

Zhaoyan asked, “Father, what do these words mean?”

The word “father” nearly broke Fu Ming’s heart. He held Zhaoyan tighter. Zhaoyan, feeling uncomfortable, frowned slightly but allowed Fu Ming to embrace him tightly.

Fu Ming stroked his head and gently explained, “Yan’er, these words mean…”

He used simple language to explain, all the while mocking himself inwardly: Having lived lived to this day, and ended up like this. It seemed that he was also ridiculed by his ignorance and laughed at, and he only got a few sighs of “it’s over” in vain.

Lost in thought, he was startled by Zhaoyan’s soft complaint, “Father, you’re squeezing Yan’er too tight; it hurts.”

Fu Ming snapped back to reality and quickly loosened his grip. Zhaoyan jumped off his lap, and Fu Ming felt an emptiness in his arms.

Looking at his hands, Fu Ming pondered the deep lines on his palms. Some say such lines signify lifelong loyalty; others say they signify loneliness. Fu Ming smiled. It was his own heart that moved and his own choice to leave. What did it have to do with fate?

Suddenly, a small hand reached into his. Zhaoyan smiled, “Father, take me to greet Grandmother. We haven’t gone yet today!”

“Alright, let’s go.” Fu Ming held Zhaoyan’s hand, grasping the warmth, and led him to see the old lady.

Lu Fei followed, while Wanlan stood at the door, quietly wiping her tears.

Two days prior, Zhou Qinqing had visited the Jin residence to see the old lady, likely discussing the Zhou family’s efforts to help Jin Yi. Whatever guarantees she gave, the old lady had been in better spirits and health recently.

Zhaoyan sat by the old lady, recounting his day with childlike delight. The trivialities of daily life, narrated by a child, became endlessly entertaining. Though the old lady did not smile brightly, her tone carried laughter as she praised her beloved grandson. Seeing Fu Ming smiling but silent, she advised him, “Changjie will be back soon, Ming’er. You should cheer up. You don’t look well; you’ve been through a lot. Take care of yourself and recover before your husband returns.” Fu Ming nodded and replied, “Thank you for your concern, Grandmother. I will.”

After chatting for a while, the old lady kept Zhaoyan with her, and Fu Ming left alone.

On his way back to Fangman Courtyard, he stopped by to see Renlan.

Renlan was embroidering a pair of mandarin ducks on a quilt. Seeing him, she set aside her work and asked, “What brings you here, Ming-ge?”

Fu Ming handed her a sketchbook. “I drew this when I had free time. You can use it for patterns.”

Renlan sometimes asked Fu Ming to draw patterns for her embroidery. She loved his drawings, so she eagerly flipped through the sketchbook. It contained vivid depictions of animals, plants, and landscapes. Holding the book, she smiled, “Thank you, Ming-ge. I’ll make something for you when I have time.”

Fu Ming replied, “No need for now. Finish your own projects first.”

“I have so much to do; I won’t finish anytime soon. But I can still make small things. Let me know if you need anything,” she said, shaking her head.

“With Wanlan and the others around, I’m sure you won’t lack anything.”

“Let me know if you think of anything.”

“Okay, I’ll let you know.”

Renlan, in good spirits, had been dressing up more carefully recently. Her radiant and cheerful appearance reassured Fu Ming, as he envisioned her happy future with Taoyang.

That night, the sky was dark and windy. The corner gate of the Jin residence opened and closed, and a small carriage left unnoticed.

The next day, Jin Yi returned home. All the masters of the house gathered in the front hall to welcome him, but Fangman Courtyard was empty. The maids searched everywhere but couldn’t find their master or the two main maids. They found a piece of paper on the desk in the study and brought it to Jin Yi.

Jin Yi, freshly washed and drinking soup in the old lady’s room, received the note instead of Fu Ming. The words struck him deeply:

“Out of the noble’s gate, the world is vast; from now on, the Xiao lang is a stranger.”

Jin Yi couldn’t understand why Fu Ming had left such a note. The Jin household was equally shocked. Fangman Courtyard was spotless, and aside from Fu Ming’s personal items, everything was in its place, as if it had never been occupied.

After thorough examination, it was clear that no abduction had occurred; Fu Ming had left voluntarily.

Jin Yi sent many people to search for him. He wouldn’t be dismissed by a simple note; he had to find Fu Ming and demand an explanation, ensuring he would never leave so easily again.

During their last meeting in the prison, there had been such deep affection. How could such love turn cold in just a few days?

Though they couldn’t find Fu Ming, they received a divorce document from the authorities, signed with Fu Ming’s familiar handwriting.

Jin Yi, confused and heartbroken, kept the unsigned document on Fu Ming’s desk, refusing to sign it. He wanted to find Fu Ming, tear up the paper in front of him, and bring him back.

But the search dragged on with no results.

The old lady, initially as shocked as Jin Yi, slowly grew resentful. She saw her grandson’s thin and haggard appearance and became bitter.

When the Zhou family proposed a marriage alliance, the old lady was tempted.

Jin Yi, however, refused. Despite the old lady’s repeated persuasion, he insisted that everything must wait until they found Fu Ming.

Unlike the old lady’s resentment, Renlan’s silence, and the others’ uncertainty, Zhaoyan remained hopeful, eagerly awaiting Fu Ming’s return. He often asked Jin Yi if his other father would come back and sometimes cried, pulling Jin Yi around to search. Jin Yi couldn’t understand how Fu Ming could leave, especially with Zhaoyan, whom he loved so dearly.

During the harsh winter solstice, Jin Yi drank heavily to stave off the cold. After sending away visitors, he staggered to Fangman Courtyard, finding it as empty as ever.

Exhausted, he leaned against the doorway, letting the wind tousle his hair and chill him to the bone. But the pain in his heart remained sharp. He spoke words he had never voiced before, revealing his deepest wounds and releasing the accumulated poison:

“Why did you treat me like this? Didn’t you say you’d wait for me to come back? Didn’t you say…” Jin Yi murmured, “Didn’t you say your heart was as steadfast as the sun and moon?”

Just as Jin Yi was about to leave, feeling numb and disheartened, Bailu rushed in, breathless. “Master, we’ve found him, we’ve found him!”

Jin Yi straightened up. “Found who? Is it Fu Ming?”

Bailu shook her head. “No, not Master Ming. It’s Baihua.”

Baihua, who had accompanied Fu Ming on many trips and met many people before Jin Yi’s release, had returned to the capital. Despite being given money to leave by Fu Ming, Baihua, a loyal servant born in the Jin household, couldn’t bring himself to stay away and ultimately returned.

Though disappointed that it wasn’t Fu Ming, Jin Yi felt a spark of hope. Finding Baihua was a lead, a glimmer of hope.

“Bring him to me at once!” Jin Yi ordered, then changed his mind. “No, I’ll go to him!”

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