BPTCMW : Chapter 29

The commercial had already been filmed, but Xia Yang still hadn’t received the “wearing effect picture” from Han Yi.

Not only was there no picture, but there was also no reply.

He sent two more playful emoji stickers, but the chat remained as silent as a dead pond.

Tsk, is it so hard to put on the new belt and take a picture?

Or maybe the gift he chose isn’t impressive enough to catch the boss’s eye.

After waiting for a while longer, Xia Yang completely gave up. He exited WeChat and opened the shopping app to confirm the receipt with the merchant.

However, upon looking at the order page, he was stunned, mouth agape, uttering a confused “Ah?”

The latest message on the order indicated that the belt, which had already been delivered to Han Yi, had just arrived in City A.

“What’s going on???” Xia Yang was baffled.

Either there was a data bug, or his eyes were bugging, or maybe the belt traveled through time in a time machine?!

He rubbed his eyes and exited the product page, intending to re-enter it to check again. Just then, a message notification popped up in the top right corner, from the customer service of the store where he had previously bought the mermaid outfit.

Xia Yang paused and entered the chat.

【Little Fish】: Hi there, are you around?

【Little Fish】: We are very sorry, there was a bug in the logistics interception system, I see your order has already been signed for [kneeling][kneeling][kneeling]

【Little Fish】: In this case, you can choose to refund and return, contact the courier to return the product directly, sorry for the trouble [flower]

After reading this, Xia Yang’s hair stood up halfway.

What the heck! His mermaid outfit has already been signed for? What kind of international joke is this!

With a head full of black lines, he clicked into the signed-for page. The mermaid outfit indeed showed as successfully signed for, by: Fang Ming (on behalf).

What the heck! Xia Yang’s whole body hair stood up.

So the gift Han Yi received wasn’t the belt, but…

He felt like his world had gone dark, and the words that came to mind were all about social death.

And then he remembered how he had idiotically asked Han Yi if he was surprised and delighted.

He had even asked the “mermaid boss” to take a picture wearing it so he could enjoy it…

The feeling of social death became even more intense.

“Dead,” completely and utterly, with no trace left.

After calming down, Xia Yang finally mustered the courage to open WeChat again. The chat with Han Yi was still stuck on asking him to send a picture and two playful emojis.

What a disaster…

He spent nearly half an hour typing and deleting messages before finally sending a small line:

【Yang】: I had some drinks this morning and just sobered up. Everything I said before was just drunken talk, forget about it…

【Yang】: Oh, and that delivery wasn’t for you, forget about that too [candle][burn incense]

This time, the other side replied quickly.

【Han Yi】: ?

【Han Yi】: Who was it for?

Xia Yang: “…”

He didn’t expect the plastic husband to dig into this, especially into a question that was so hard for him to explain, what a nightmare!

Staring at the chat box for a few seconds, he finally typed out a few weak words.

【Yang】: Haha, well, it was meant for my not-so-wealthy second cousin, she’s preparing for an art exam recently.

【Han Yi】: …

Xia Yang didn’t want to think about the meaning behind those ellipses, so he threw in two casual [yellow bean grinning] emojis and quickly changed the subject.

 【Yang】: By the way, the gift for you is still on the way. Trust me, this time it’s definitely a serious, carefully selected one. You can quietly look forward to it~

【Han Yi】: Has the commercial finished shooting?

Judging by the tone of the reply, it seemed like he had completely given up on expecting anything from Xia Yang’s gift.

Xia Yang sighed and typed:

【Yang】: It’s finished, I’ll be back tomorrow. I have some free time tonight. I heard there’s a nationally famous beach swimwear party in City B, full of handsome men and beautiful women. Do you know where that party is? I asked Director Xiang, but he wouldn’t tell me, saying it would be better to visit historical sites instead…

【Han Yi】: Not familiar, don’t know, working

【Yang】: …

*

Early Sunday morning, Xia Yang took the earliest flight back to City A.

Before entering the house, he checked his phone and found that the birthday gift had just started being delivered.

Great.

Everything was falling into place, even if the journey ahead was twisted and magical.

The villa had been simply decorated, with fresh and vibrant roses and lilies on the table. Xia Yang had also bought flowers from a florist on his way back.

For a birthday, there must be a sense of ceremony.

Entering the house, Han Yi and Mrs. Tang were in the living room having coffee. Xia Yang walked briskly towards his plastic husband.

“Happy birthday, Yi Ge!” He bent down and gently hugged his shoulder as he spoke.

Although their relationship was like plastic, there was still a slight sense of longing after not seeing each other for a few days.

Han Yi’s arm, hanging at his side, moved slightly. Just then, Xia Yang loosened his arm from his shoulder and presented the flowers he had specially bought from the florist.

“These are for you~”

Han Yi looked over, his gaze pausing for a moment.

“A cactus?”

“Yes,” Xia Yang grinned, “Roses aren’t really your style. Do you know the flower language of the cactus?” He lightly touched the small spines with his fingertips, his bright eyes seeming to shine, “It’s resilience and strength, a miracle born. I guessed you might like its meaning.”

Han Yi looked down at the sturdy cactus, then lifted his eyes to look at Xia Yang. In his deep black eyes, there seemed to be a faint ripple.

“Here, for you,” Xia Yang solemnly handed the cactus over to Han Yi, “Take good care of it, consider it as our strong and brave little kid!”

Han Yi: “…”

After handing over the “child,” Han Yi’s two close friends, Tang Siming and Liang Yue, also arrived.

One brought a bottle of rare vintage wine, the other carried a Polaroid camera.

“Happy birthday, Yi Ge!” Liang Yue raised the Polaroid as soon as he entered and took a photo of the couple by the table.

Tang Siming shook his head at this: “It’s 2032, who still uses a Polaroid?”

“There are plenty who do, you just don’t understand love!” Liang Yue hummed, pulling out the photo, “This is my special gift to Yi Ge and sister-in-law, a sweet generator, storing little moments of love here.”

As the photo developed, Xia Yang leaned over to look. Though it was a candid shot, it captured a lively and unique moment.

In the photo, he was slightly wide-eyed, looking at the camera like a startled deer, with one hand on Han Yi’s shoulder, while Han Yi’s profile was captured, not looking at the camera but at the little deer beside him.

It had a sense of harmony.

“Wow! Yi Ge and sister-in-law really look like a couple.” Tang Siming admired the photo sincerely.

“I told you! This is called capturing the essence of love from life, into life.” Liang Yue proudly presented his work, reciting a poem, “You look at the scenery, and the one watching you is me. The bright moon decorates sister-in-law’s window, sister-in-law decorates little Yi Ge’s dream.”

Han Yi: “…”

Xia Yang: “…”

With black lines all over their foreheads, listening to someone show off a pseudo-original poem, the courier arrived with the proper gift.

Tang Siming and Liang Yue were curious: “What’s the great gift sister-in-law got for Yi Ge? Is it okay for us to see?”

“Guess,” Xia Yang opened a tiny crack in the gift box.

“Um… a watch?” Tang Siming squinted, peering into the narrow opening where nothing could be seen.

Liang Yue rubbed his chin: “A card holder?”

“Neither,” Xia Yang shook his head, “Yi Ge’s watches and bags are worth eight figures; I can’t afford them. This is a very practical and down-to-earth leather item.”

“Huh?” Tang Siming and Liang Yue exchanged an unspoken glance, and in unison, they guessed: “Got it! A whip!”

Han Yi: “…”

Xia Yang: “…”

Xia Yang: “Neither of us is into herding; what would we do with a whip?”

Tang Siming & Liang Yue: “.”

Why would married men not understand what it could be used for?

Ignoring their expressions, Xia Yang lifted the lid of the gift box, revealing a low-key, exquisite black leather belt.

Tang Siming and Liang Yue awkwardly covered their faces: “Sorry, we thought you two were less innocent than we imagined.”

Han Yi glanced at them deeply, then reached out to take the belt from the box, looking it over several times.

The leather was soft and luxurious, a deep black top-grain leather perfectly paired with a silver buckle, very suitable for business.

“Do you like it?” Xia Yang tilted his head, looking at him.

Han Yi’s fingers lightly caressed the smooth surface of the belt, leaving a faint warmth from his fingertips. His obsidian-like eyes lifted, meeting Xia Yang’s gaze, and he gently nodded.

“Yes, I like it.”

*

At noon, the birthday feast began, and everyone raised their glasses to toast the birthday boy.

Mrs. Tang was emotional, her voice trembling with excitement, “Counting the years, it’s been so long since Xiaoyi last celebrated a birthday. This year, with Yangyang around, he’s back to celebrating.”

Tang Siming and Liang Yue nodded along: “Yes, thanks to sister-in-law, our Yi Ge is celebrating birthdays again!”

“Don’t thank me,” Xia Yang blushed, pursing his lips, “It’s the charm of love~”

Han Yi: “…”

After a glass of whiskey, the burning sensation spread from his mouth, as if a fiery bead rolled down his throat to his heart. Xia Yang wasn’t used to such strong liquor and stuck out his tongue, almost tearing up.

Han Yi glanced at him sideways and pushed a glass of water towards him, lowering his voice, “Don’t push yourself if you can’t handle alcohol.”

Xia Yang grabbed the glass and gulped down several sips of water. He wiped his mouth and smiled, “I have to drink your birthday toast. It’s not about showing off; it’s about sincerity and heart.”

Saying this, he picked up his glass again and clinked it gently with Han Yi’s, his deer-like eyes glistening with a misty sheen, “Happy birthday, Yi Ge.”

This was the second time he said it.

Across the table, Mrs. Tang and the two close friends turned their gaze towards them.

Xia Yang swirled his glass and continued, “The birthday star just made a wish, and I made one too.”

Han Yi’s dark eyes locked onto his face, “What did you wish for?”

“When we’re young, home is the eaves we hide under from the rain. At a certain age, we become the eaves ourselves, unable and unwilling to seek shelter everywhere. I hope I can be your eaves, to shield you from the wind and rain, to dispel the cold.”

Mrs. Tang and the two friends were touched, wiping their eyes. Han Yi looked at his flushed cheeks and those bright, pure eyes, “You’re drunk,” he said, his Adam’s apple bobbing.

“Well, if you think I’m drunk, then I guess I am,” Xia Yang rubbed his face and smiled again.

He also felt as if he were drunk, yet he believed his mind was clear when he said those words.

Maybe the plastic husband was resilient and strong, not needing anyone to be his “eaves.”

But this was his most honest thought at the moment, and he spoke as he felt.

Perhaps alcohol does make people emotional, perhaps he really was drunk…

Indeed.

The birthday banquet hadn’t fully concluded when the not-so-drunk Xia Yang began feeling dizzy, as if little birds were flying over his head.

Seeing this, Han Yi called Fang Ming to help him to his room to rest. The swaying young man was led out of the dining room and up the stairs, loudly singing along the way.

“Hey, don’t take me to the wrong room; I’ve reunited with Yi Ge now.” Xia Yang babbled as Fang Ming guided him upstairs, “If Yi Ge can’t find me in the room later, he’ll cry.”

“…I doubt that,” Fang Ming muttered softly.

“How could he not!” Xia Yang shook his intoxicated head, still managing to muster a retort, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder; single people wouldn’t understand this feeling.”

Fang Ming, feeling a bit hurt: “…”

After they left, Xia Yang kicked off his slippers, discarded his socks, and flopped onto the soft, comfortable bed with outstretched arms.

Just as his face hit the pillow, a memory of Han Yi’s previous rules flashed through his mind—no wearing outer jackets or pants on his bed.

The impression was so deep that he remembered even under the influence of alcohol.

Xia Yang exhaled heavily, even though he felt too dizzy to move, he still followed the rules and got up, stumbling towards the walk-in closet.

Han Yi’s closet was at the far end of the bedroom, spacious and organized, with different sections for various clothing and accessories.

Since their recent “reunion,” Xia Yang had also placed some of his clothes there.

He opened the door, and with his limited brain capacity, headed towards the loungewear section. As he pulled open a drawer, he saw an unopened set of pajamas lying in the corner.

A tank top, a pair of shorts, and a long, waist-tightening fishtail.

Wow!

His heavy eyelids slightly opened a bit. When did he buy these pajamas? Did Han Yi buy them for him?

They looked quite playful!

He bent down, picked up the mermaid costume, and looked at it for a moment, then, in a hazy state, began changing out of his outer clothes…

*

Downstairs, after seeing off Tang Siming and Liang Yue, Han Yi headed upstairs; it was almost 2 PM.

The nap time had long passed; usually, he would have started working by this hour, but today was different. He didn’t go straight to his study.

He maneuvered his wheelchair to the bedroom door, pushing it open, and was met with a faint smell of alcohol in the air.

Scattered on the floor were slippers and socks—definitely not the work of someone sober.

He moved his wheelchair closer to the bed, and his gaze fell.

The young man lay sprawled on the bed, head resting on his arm, his hair messily draped over his forehead. His face was flushed, like a ripe peach, and his slightly parted lips glistened with a bit of drool.

Just then, the young man turned over, the loosely covering blanket sliding off his body. Han Yi’s gaze followed the blanket’s descent…

Suddenly, his pupils contracted.

What a bizarre sight, so eye-searing!

Instinctively, Han Yi moved his wheelchair back half a meter.

He hadn’t noticed earlier with the blanket covering, but now he could see clearly. Xia Yang’s lower half was wrapped in a fishtail, tightly hugging his waist and hips, and trailing down, covering his legs. The bright red fabric flared out over his feet, splitting into two flaps at the bottom, reaching down to the floor.

The wide fishtail was even adorned with ceremonious bling bling “scales.”

Every slight movement scattered scales onto the sheets and floor.

Han Yi: “…”

Alcohol. It ruins people.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a moment to calm down. He picked up his phone and dialed Fang Ming, “Come up here, help me…”

Halfway through the sentence, he stopped. Fang Ming was still listening on the other end, “Sir?”

Han Yi came to his senses, glanced at the “sleeping beauty” on the bed again.

“Never mind, forget it.”

Fang Ming: “…”

Hanging up, Han Yi moved his wheelchair closer to the bed.

The “Sleeping Beauty Fish” on the bed seemed to sense the restriction around his legs and subconsciously kicked them a couple of times.

As a result, the fish tail slid down a few inches, loosely gathering around his knees. The movement caused the hem of his top to ride up, rather impolitely revealing a glimpse of snug-fitting underwear.

“…”

Han Yi closed his eyes briefly, took a deep breath, and pulled the blanket back over him. Then he reached for the end of the fishtail, intending to help remove the cumbersome and awkward garment.

But as he pulled halfway, the sleeping young man suddenly opened his eyes, his face, hazy with drunkenness, showing a hint of anger.

“Who’s the pervert trying to take off my pants! I’ll have my husband run you over with his wheelchair!”

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