Novel schedule on pause, Rain ran awaaaaaay ! See you next week, to resume some series !!

HOLM : Chapter 18

Anyway, I Won’t Let You Touch Me

 

 

In the usually calm and steady depths of Chu Shiye’s eyes, there was shock, helplessness, and a sense of being tricked… mixed with a hint of grievance.

 

Ji Mian couldn’t help but chuckle softly. “Alright, I’ll stop teasing you. After all, you did treat me to food.”

 

Since Chu Shiye didn’t want to talk about it, Ji Mian decided to let it go.

 

After all, this Alpha always seemed to have small, incomprehensible bursts of emotion, but they would quickly fade away.

 

Chu Shiye muttered, “Oh.” He didn’t seem entirely convinced and kept sneaking glances at Ji Mian.

 

After a while, he stole another glance.

 

Ji Mian asked, “What? Or are you finally ready to tell me?”

 

Chu Shiye immediately averted his gaze, looking straight ahead with feigned indifference.

 

No, nothing had happened.

 

The sound of light laughter reached his ears. Chu Shiye, almost instinctively, sneaked another glance in Ji Mian’s direction before quickly looking away again.

 

“What’s for dinner tonight?” he asked, as if trying to change the topic.

 

Ji Mian replied, “You should ask yourself—what do you want to learn to cook, or what do you want to eat?”

 

Chu Shiye hesitated. “I’m fine with anything. It’s up to you.”

 

Ji Mian countered, “I’m also fine with anything. It’s up to you.”

 

Chu Shiye began, “I—”

 

“Stop,” Ji Mian raised his hand. “Don’t go in circles. Just decide already.”

 

After some serious thought, Chu Shiye answered, “Milk… mushroom soup?”

 

This was a dish his adoptive father had mentioned before—a favorite from the past. However, after adopting Chu Shiye, his father’s salary barely covered their living expenses. Although he often talked about the dish, they’d never had the chance to make it.

 

Ji Mian responded, “That’s easy. Let’s go, I’ll make it for you.”

 

 

It was a rainy night. The city lights dimmed. At the end of an alley, a disheveled drunkard stumbled and collapsed near a garbage pile.

 

The stench from the trash heap was unbearable, but the drunkard didn’t care. He grabbed a bottle of liquor and gulped it down.

 

Suddenly—

 

Rainwater gushed into the deserted alley. A slim, shadowy figure cloaked in black moved slowly in the darkness, their footsteps masked by the sound of rain. They stopped in front of the drunkard.

 

The drunkard squinted his cloudy eyes at the stranger, letting out a burp. “You…”

 

The figure lifted their cloak, raising a skeletal hand high into the air.

 

A flash of lightning illuminated the scene for a brief moment, turning night into day. In the drunkard’s wide-open eyes, the raised hand was reflected clearly.

 

It was holding a knife, gleaming coldly.

 

 

The heavy rain poured down as a warm light filled a small house.

 

The night was chilly, but the steaming dishes on the table dispelled the cold. Ji Mian sat across from Chu Shiye. “How does it taste?”

 

“It’s very good,” Chu Shiye said, holding a spoon. “The milk flavor is great.”

 

The taste was better than he had imagined—something he’d never experienced before.

 

Ji Mian’s tone lifted slightly. “Then drink more.”

 

Chu Shiye gently stirred his spoon and replied, “Mm.”

 

The silky white soup was dotted with round, plump mushrooms floating on the surface, releasing a sweet aroma.

 

At the edge of the table, a failed dish sat—a dark, unidentifiable mess bubbling like black sludge.

 

It was one of Chu Shiye’s earlier attempts.

 

Chu Shiye glanced at it out of the corner of his eye and fell silent.

 

For years, he had been eating things like that and had never thought it was a problem.

 

No wonder, on the day he met Su Lan, the other person had avoided his porridge so adamantly.

 

… Su Lan really was a kind person.

 

“It’s fine,” Ji Mian said suddenly, noticing Chu Shiye staring at the failed dish for a little too long.

 

“I’ll teach you again tomorrow. If it doesn’t work out tomorrow, we’ll try the day after. We’ve got plenty of time.”

 

Chu Shiye paused with his chopsticks. “…Mm.”

 

After finishing their warm meal, Chu Shiye cleaned up the dishes and went to wash them.

 

When he finished, he brought Ji Mian a bowl of medicine, cooled to the right temperature, with two pieces of candy on the side.

 

He then sat across from Ji Mian, quietly watching him.

 

Ji Mian asked, “Not upset anymore?”

 

Chu Shiye looked confused. “Hm?”

 

Ji Mian explained, “Earlier today, I thought you were mad at me.”

 

Chu Shiye quickly denied it. “I’ve never been mad at you.”

 

“Oh, but you didn’t seem very happy at the time,” Ji Mian said. “It wasn’t because of me, was it?”

 

Chu Shiye immediately shook his head.

 

At the time… he had just felt a little sad because of what Ji Mian had said.

 

Later, when he returned to the empty house, he realized Ji Mian probably hadn’t meant anything by it—he had just misunderstood.

 

But soon after, he fell into confusion again.

 

Why had he felt sad because of a few words from Su Lan?

 

Why did it matter to him?

 

… Chu Shiye found himself unable to figure it out no matter how hard he tried.

 

As a result, when he went to pick Ji Mian up again, he didn’t know how to face him.

 

Chu Shiye lowered his gaze slightly, avoiding Ji Mian’s eyes.

 

Ji Mian observed him and asked, “Huh, why do you look like you have something on your mind again?”

 

Chu Shiye: “…”

 

Why does he always notice?

 

Ji Mian smiled and said, “What do you mean why? It’s obvious.”

 

Chu Shiye: “…”

 

Expressionless, he fell deeper into confusion.

 

And frustration.

 

Ji Mian sighed. “Oh dear, you’re getting all tangled up again.”

 

Why does this Alpha always like to think about such strange things?

 

Ji Mian reached out and patted Chu Shiye’s head.

 

A little comfort.

 

Chu Shiye stiffened for a moment, then remained still, letting Ji Mian pat him obediently.

 

Ji Mian thought: What a good boy.

 

Maybe… this means he won’t refuse mental guidance?

 

With that in mind, before bed, Ji Mian—just like always—reached out to Chu Shiye and said, “Come here for a moment.”

 

Chu Shiye immediately stepped back, dodging Ji Mian’s hand.

 

He quickly dragged his sleeping mat far away from the bed.

 

Ji Mian: “?”

 

Ji Mian: “Do you dislike me?”

 

Chu Shiye: “No.”

 

Ji Mian: “Then what are you doing?”

 

Chu Shiye lowered his head and began tidying up the bedding that had been moved to the corner of the room. “AO should maintain proper boundaries.”

 

Ji Mian: “…”

 

Do you even realize what you’re saying?

 

Ji Mian raised an eyebrow.

 

Chu Shiye met his gaze, his expression unchanging. “I want to pause the mental guidance sessions for a few days. Anyway, you should focus on getting proper rest.”

 

The image of Su Lan coughing up blood and collapsing unconscious was still vividly etched in his mind.

 

No matter what, he couldn’t allow Su Lan to be put at risk because of him.

 

Ji Mian thought: *As expected, I shouldn’t have been so hasty yesterday and frightened this Alpha.*

 

But mental guidance was clearly something beneficial for Chu Shiye. 

 

*…How could someone only think of others and not consider themselves at all?*

 

Ji Mian wanted to say something more. “I—”

 

Chu Shiye interrupted him, his voice resolute, leaving no room for discussion: “This isn’t a negotiation; it’s a decision.”

 

Ji Mian fell silent.

 

A second later, he said, “You’re being mean to me.”

 

Chu Shiye immediately replied, “I’m sorry.”

 

He lowered his head, softening his tone slightly. “But still, it’s a decision.”

 

With that, he raised his hand and switched off the light with a “click.”

 

The room plunged into darkness, and Chu Shiye quickly said, “Sleep.”

 

Ji Mian: “…”

 

Chu Shiye lay down decisively and without hesitation. Ji Mian, half-amused and half-exasperated, shook his head, realizing that Chu Shiye wouldn’t let him do any mental guidance tonight, no matter what.

 

*If only I could summon my mental projection.*

 

If that were possible, yesterday’s backlash wouldn’t have happened, and this Alpha wouldn’t be so worried.

 

That thought floated up uncontrollably again as Ji Mian lay down in silence, pulling the blanket over himself.

 

His eyes quickly adjusted to the dark room, and Chu Shiye quietly turned his head.

 

Ji Mian lay on his side with his back to him, the blanket lazily draped over his waist.

 

Chu Shiye thought: *Why doesn’t he cover himself properly?*

 

*Is he cold?*

 

In the dark, he asked softly, “Are you upset?”

 

Ji Mian didn’t move.

 

Chu Shiye thought for a moment. “If you’re upset…”

 

His tone became sincere and serious.

 

“I still won’t let you touch me.”

 

Ji Mian: “…”

 

Chu Shiye continued, “Pull your blanket up a bit. It’s cold at night, and you might catch a chill.”

 

Ji Mian remained silent.

 

Chu Shiye added, “If you cover yourself properly, then I—”

 

Ji Mian shifted slightly, barely perceptibly.

 

Chu Shiye’s tone became firm. “Still won’t let you touch me.”

 

Ji Mian: “…”

 

“But you might still catch a chill,” Chu Shiye continued. “And if you catch a cold, I’ll be even less likely to let you touch me.”

 

“So, you need to cover yourself,” Chu Shiye concluded with emphasis. “Either way, I’m not letting you touch me.”

 

Ji Mian: “…………”

 

Expressionless, Ji Mian got out of bed and walked straight toward Chu Shiye.

 

Chu Shiye: “!”

 

He immediately tried to dodge, but Ji Mian took a single step forward, grabbed Chu Shiye’s blanket, and yanked it over his head.

 

He pulled it tightly, wrapping Chu Shiye up completely, and covered his head in the process.

 

Taking advantage of Chu Shiye’s inability to see, Ji Mian gave him a couple of firm pats.

 

Then, still expressionless, he returned to his bed.

 

Chu Shiye: “…”

 


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